Wondering about the sexual education of Christian children.
March 13th, 2010
Background. Jesus declares he has all authority. He grants that to the disciples. They in concert with Paul and the Holy Spirit grant liberty from all law for the Christians (actually just the gentile Christians), declaring in so many words that the law of love was sufficient for all actions pleasing to God (through the word of Jesus) and that there were but two rules to be imposed (the “necessary things”). The first rule reminded the gentile Christian to be sensitive to the conscience of another Christian and not to flaunt his liberty to the detriment of another Christians. Essentially this introduces the “third love” where the Christian (like Jesus to his friends) loves the fellow Christian more than self. And the second rule was a discipline of self control as a banner of valor on the part of the follower of Jesus. This was exemplified in the extreme of sexual conduct and the Christian was expected to be chaste apart from marriage. This then was the extent of the liberty (which Kant considered as “revolutionary” in religious histories) that as followers of Jesus it was understood that they were dedicated to Jesus’ rule of love (of neighbor and God) and that they surrender this liberty to the conscience of another Christian who is “weak in faith” and that they display their dedication to their vow by refusing to engage in sexual activity except within the marriage. Since this was unanimous and by the disciples and by the Holy Spirit it is absolute and cannot be changed (an important aspect of Kant’s “moral religion”). Paul is a primary source of the interpretation of the spirit of this Christian liberty. He was commission by Jesus personally and this commission was acknowledged by the disciples (who, again, had all authority conveyed by Jesus). It was he who enabled us to discern the spirit of the rules of the order of Gentile Christians, e.g., that it was not just the three listed unclean items that must be avoided, but anything which would make a brother in Christ to stumble (and otherwise we might be stuck with literal stuff as are the Jews with their laws). And regarding the fiery youth he told them to get married and release their fire in that ultimate way. It is worth a note that the marriage for Paul was seen as a representation of the Kingdom of God on earth among early beings, namely it being totally communal and transparent and loving. So much for that. All of this is based on the sacred histories of the Christian churches. Now let’s get up to date.
First when two people make a vow of marriage it would be very desirable and important to have them both having evidence of their own capacity to make a vow. A boy will be promising to be faithful to his spouse (traditionally a woman). Why should anyone place any trust in this vow? It is easy to say the words (and today people snicker from the back of the church during this part of the ceremony of marriage). Even if we assume the youth is sincere, if it is not based on some sort of proven record then we can only hope he has himself under constant control. There is nothing like the proof of experience to gain self respect and respect in the eyes of others. So this notion of the chastity is important in the self-esteem of the youth, knowing that they have accomplished something, something which is not easy, especially in the current culture.
Now we want to consider the sexual behavior of these gentile Christians as they find themselves today in the world. I take my inspiration from Paul when he calls upon us to be expedient in the work of God and to start thinking for ourselves.
Given my take on the sexual make up of the youth I would suggest that we approach this matter by a particular definition of chastity and even more the understanding of sexual contact. Drawing on the suggestions, it seems to me, of the old testament we could define sexual contact as dealing with a penetration of another person (traditionally thought to be a woman). It speaks of man lying with mankind as with womankind. If we could use that definition, then it would be permitted for the youth to find sexual release through liberal body touchings and be limited only by the prohibition of sexual touchings. I think this will be an attainable goal that the youth can find a reasonable and even pleasurable outlet for the fires raging within and at the same time establish the possibility of self respect as a person whose promise is meaningful, and thus as one who can be trusted.
In a word: chastity will mean no sexual touching, and this will deal solely with the penetration of another body below the navel. And then adherence to the chastity as proclaimed (and perhaps, per the OT, even as understood) by the Council of Jerusalem. The expected result is less sexual problems for the youth and a means for attaining to moral pride, namely having kept a vow in the face of temptations.
Note. According to this definitions lesbians could not be expected to have any sexual contact whatsoever, and this sort of contact between two women was not mentioned in the OT (I think I am right on this). Homosexuals might not feel deprived by having to be chaste (as understood here). Perhaps for them sexual contact would be defined without reference to the navel, i.e., penetration anywhere in the body of the other. Masturbation of course would not be having sex.
General. I take all of this to be justified by Paul’s admonition to be expedient for the sake of Christ, that we should use our heads and best understanding of things to best promote the love work of Christ in the world. Here we are giving the youth a reason to be proud of the vow that they make to another in a Christian marriage. And we are true to the spirit of Rule Two of the Edict of Liberation (Acts 15).
Perhaps at age 12 the Christian youth are set free (under parental guidance) to approach the limits of chastity and become at ease in the intimacy of another person and have full peace of mind. This could be incorporated into the Confirmation ceremony, the coming of age for self rule.
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